When I start doing well in competitions
I personally tend to evaluate my own self worth in terms of my accomplishments and failures in sport now. When I start doing well in competitions, I feel unstoppable and on top of the world. But again, the opposite is very true as well. He choked on a burrito, no one could do the Heimlich on him, he passed out and almost died. I was at the hospital and while they were clearing out the burrito that he aspirated, a nurse handed me his clothes, including the pants he shit in when he had passed out and lost consciousness (and control of his bowels) for a few minutes due to suffocation. I took them home and washed them without blinking.
I also worried that if I bring this up to him, he going to deny it, and I feel crazy, but I don think I feel any better. I would never want to do anything to drive a wedge in their friendship, because I know she means so much to him. He swears up and down they are just friends, but knowing they sometimes hang out one on one turns my stomach.
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